Friday, May 13, 2011

Admiral John Q. Buzzschackler, Esq.

Unfortunately, Stephen is still having troubles with the legalities of his SuperPAC. He needed to have famed lawyer Trevor Potter on the show (again) to help him sort through all the various laws and restrictions about PACs and Super PACs.

The background on this is a letter from Viacom Lawyers that Stephen read recently on The Colbert Report. It starts out as follows: "Please do not read this on the air."

Oops.

The letter was quite lengthy, so Stephen paraphrased it. Paraphrasing legal jargon is always a good idea. I highly recommend it.

Here's what the Viacom lawyers told Stephen (as paraphrased by Stephen):

"We are stupid lawyers who hate fun. If you do this, we're all scared because people might get mad at us. I think we just peed a little. So, even though we know it is totally legal and everything, and everybody wants you to do it, we're not going to let you.
Sincerely,
Admiral John Q. Buzzschackler, Esq."

Legally, it is illegal. With all the integrity and sincerity that Colbert followers have come to expect from him, Stephen did the right thing and exploited the loophole.

Here's how it all plays out: Stephen can't talk about his PAC. But, if Stephen "reported" on his PAC or did "analysis" of it, then his SuperPAC would be covered under the "News Exemption" which is why FOX can go on, and on, and on, talking about SuperPACs.

Long story short, Trevor Potter just happened to have a letter that he had already drafted to get the "Media Exemption" for Stephen. However, the process may take up to 60 days, so Stephen put a "Lincoln" in with the letter, not as a bribe, but as Free Speech.

So, hopefully Stephen will get his "News Exemption" so that he can have his SuperPAC and talk, I mean "report" or "analyze" about it, too.

* Image is not actual Five Dollar Bill.

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