Poop Power - I Have a Business Card

The big news in the world is how many followers @PrezBillyJeff has. Last night Stephen noted that in just 24 hours, Billy Jeff Clinton has 88,076 followers. Now there are 131,717 and that will probably go up by the time I'm done writing this post. It is the epitome of the famous "The Colbert Bump." Also of interest to the Colbert Nation would be to follow the Clinton Foundation Twitter Feed  @ClintonTweet .

Most of you reading this did not attend the Clinton Global Initiative University in St. Louis. I wasn't there so I'm just assuming that you weren't either. I wish I had gone. Stephen talked about Jessica Matthews. She designed a soccer ball that generates electricity while you play soccer with it. After half an hour of playing soccer, it could keep a light bulb lit for three hours. Stephen met up with Bill Clinton and Chelsea Clinton at the CGIU Exchange Fair. It was a great opportunity for him to learn more about the innovative young minds coming up with the projects. We saw how to extract drinkable water from air, and football helmets with sensors to detect injuries. Of course, not everyone who plays football suffers from injuries. Stephen played football and he never suffered any injuries. Other projects include helping farmers in Columbia grow their product (tea) and market it here. Also of interest is the Humanure Power Project. Again, another source of power that has been under-utilized.

Stephen was so inspired by the young people, but also disappointed that each project only addressed one problem. To lead the way, Stephen demonstrated his model volcano that symbolized how he would solve many of today's problems or address today's goals, including  Public Health, Peace, Human Rights, Climate Change, Poverty, and the Environment. There were many people who witnessed Stephen's demonstration of his Volcano Metaphor Project, but none were more impressed than Stephen himself. His applause was so heartfelt that there was no need for anyone else to applaud. And indeed, neither Bill Clinton, nor Chelsea Clinton, nor the thirty or so young creative innovators watching applauded.

In the next segment, I learned something I had not known before. The pilgrims landed in Mayflower, Arkansas. Oops that's wrong, It was in Little Rock. Whichever place they landed, it was definitely Arkansas because they came over on an ark. Anyway, you may remember that oil spill in Mayflower, Arkansas. Exxon thinks of it as more of a free oil giveaway than an oil spill. The good news is that we are not seeing much more damage. That's because the area is off limits (as in you will be arrested) to reporters and photographers. And there is a no-fly zone over the area. But still, quilted paper towels are being used to clean up the oil as well as pushing it down storm drains so that the oil will head over to wetlands where it can mingle with nature.

Stephen's guest last night was a Detroiter or is it Detroitite, Detroitan, a Detroitman? Oh  of course - Detroit native Charlie LeDuff taking with Stephen about his book "Detroit - An American Autopsy." He warns that we need to pay attention to Detroit learn lessons from what has happened there. The auto industry is booming, that is the companies are doing fine. But the jobs have been shipped overseas. There is concern on his part that if we don't invest in our children, in our cities, we are going to see more instances of decline.

Now for an update. The followers for @PrezBillyJeff are now up to a whopping 132,725. That's more than one  thousand new followers in just the time it took me to write this post. Keep following fans, keep following.

Second Favorite Organ

The environment is always nearby. That makes it special. Recently, Mayflower, Arkansas was inundated with oil and not the red hot olive oil kind that is great for dipping. No. It's a mess. Who wants black sticky "diluted bitumen" instead of green grass in their backyard? Yuck. I can't help but wonder what's next when things like this happen.

In an ironic twist, Stephen played portions of the Jeremy Irons Huffington Post interview about gay marriage.  When you put your mind to it, you can come up with something that no one else has thought of before. Or at least, not that anyone actually said on camera. And in a rare departure from the news we typically enjoy on The Colbert Report, Stephen put forth some of his opinions on the issues, although he didn't really have strong feelings either way.

One thing that Google hasn't dominated yet is brain mapping. I enjoy their road maps and satellite images and street views, but they don't have a brain map yet, at least not that I know of. But President Obama is planning on mapping brains. Indeed, there is an acronym - BRAIN. Stephen pointed out that it's not fair to use the acronym in the acronym, but I don't have feelings either way about that. BRAIN stands for "Brain Research through Advancing Innovative Neurotechnologies." And now you all see the value of acronyms. Anyway, Stephen pointed out that it logically follows that if a gun registry means they're coming for our guns, it follows that a brain registry means they're coming for our brains. Don't worry. I think there are many people out there that won't miss them.

Dr. Francis Collins joined Stephen last Thursday (4th time here) to talk about Brain Mapping. From what Stephen said when Dr. Collins was introduced, it sounds like he has quite a brain himself, maybe even as good as the one Stephen has. And he brought a brain. Not a real brain, but a rainbow colored teaching model. There are 86 billion neurons in each of our brains.  So, did the good doctor sit in the green room and count them before the show? Someone had to count them, otherwise how would we know? I guess that doesn't matter. What does matter is that Google will not be driving a tiny car up your nose to map it. There are other ways to do that.

Stephen donned a colorful red and blue cap with nice white dots. The cap had a beautiful rainbow colored ribbon attached which allowed us to see Stephen's brain activity, and it was not unlike the Richter Scale. This incredible technology was duct-taped together, so you know it was built by real techies. Some day, when all is known about brain mapping, it should be possible to get "Call Me Maybe" out of your head. You're singing it right now, aren't you?

While Dr. Francis Collins sees the possibility of some day curing things like Autism, Schizophrenia, Parkinson's Disease, Epilepsy and Alzheimer's, Stephen wondered about the possibility of tricking your brain into thinking it's a snow day and school has been cancelled and your mom brings you tomato soup and a grilled cheese sandwich.