Canceled Again

Nation, tonight's episode of The Colbert Report is canceled due to Hurricane Sandy. If you reserved tickets for tonight, please check your email for further details.

Again, that is what is over at ColbertNation.com about Tonight's Taping. Tonight's rerun will therefore be with Mitch Daniels. He wrote a book that reminds Stephen of an excellent book written by someone else. Read my post here about Mitch Daniels and find out who wrote that excellent other book. Hint: The other book is about America and Greatness.

But if you are at a loss of what to do if you don't want to watch a rerun of The Colbert Report, here's a list of suggestions.

1.First of all, go over to RedCross.org and donate some money to help victims of Hurricane Sandy.

2. Read all my posts at The Colbert Bump, starting with the first one.

3. Donate blood. "Hurricane Sandy has forced the cancellation of approximately 300 American Red Cross blood drives in 14 states along the East Coast, resulting in a shortfall of nearly 9,000 units of blood and platelets thus far." Go to the American Red Cross Website to find out how you can become a blood donor. You'll get a free cookie! There's great information about first-time donors, eligibility requirements, and even a Search for blood drives by Zip Code.

4. Go over to bing and look at cute Arctic fox cub.

5. Get out your To Do List and do some of the jobs on it.

6. Read books by Stephen Colbert:
Stephen Colbert's Tek Jansen
I Am America (And So Can You)
I Am a Pole (And So Can You)
America Again: Re-becoming the Greatness We Never Weren't

7. Write an actual letter on paper to someone you haven't seen in a while, put it in an actual envelope with correct address on it, put actual postage stamp on it, and mail it.

8. Start a new hobby. Might I suggest Juggling!!! Watch the video and you will be able to juggle in no time at all. Blue shows how it's done.

9. Take the dog for a walk. Good exercise for you and a real treat for the dog.

10. Find out about the local elections in your area. Yes we have a presidential election, but there are also state, county, city, school elections on the ballot as well as questions, amendments, and other important stuff. Election day is Tuesday, November 6. Go to your polling place and vote on Tuesday. I'm sure Stephen will talk about the elections in the coming days.

Of course, you can always just watch The Colbert Report tonight as usual. Even if you have seen it before, it is fascinating, informative and at times even humorous.

You Said it Was For Charity

First of all, and most importantly, who will decide this election? Women. But, enough about that.It's time for Stephen Ghoulbert's Spooky-time Halloween Fun Guide. This should be good and just in time for Halloween.

All You Need
1. Big Bowl of Candy
2. Big Bowl of Razor Blades - This will prove that there are no razor blades in the bowl of candy. Makes perfect sense.

Ding Dong. Who's at the door? More importantly, why is there a front door on the set right next to Stephen's desk? Where did that come from? And who could it be? Could it be Clint Eastwood? Could it be Donald Trump? Could it be a BEAR? Yes, it could be all of those, but it's actually Tom Hanks. They made small talk and then Stephen went on and on about Tom Hank's movie, Cloud Atlas, which opens on October 26. Coincidence? I don't believe in coincidences.

Tom was here to show off great Halloween costumes. Then kids started showing up one by one for Trick-or-Treating. Here's a list of some of the kids. See if you notice anything about them.

1. Kid in Cowboy outfit saying, "There's a snake in my boot."
2. Kid in Astronaut uniform saying, "Houston, we have a problem."
3. Kid in the briefest of clothes, sporting long hair and a beard, holding a FedEx package. His candy bucket happens to be a volleyball with the top cut open. Is this sounding familiar?
4. Next were four kids that Stephen did not recognize. What do you think the chances are that these are characters from Cloud Atlas?
5. One more time the doorbell rang and Tom Hanks rushed to answer it first. After some yelling and fist pounding, Tom Hanks pulled in a kid, Army Man.

Just as Stephen was apologizing to Tom Hanks, the door burst open and someone, a life-sized Army Man, threw the door open and said, "What's the deal, Hanks?" No need to apologize, Stephen. This was a shameless movie plug for Cloud Atlas, opening October 26 in theaters and IMAX.

Also mentioned was the movie Argo. And then Tom Hanks looked into the camera and said, "Go see Cloud Atlas."

Next up was guest Mitch Daniels, who will be Governor of Indiana for only 2 more months. It's pretty hard to follow a big star like Tom Hanks. Mitch Daniels has a book out in paperback, "Keeping the Republic - Saving America by Trusting Americans." Stephen mentioned how he doesn't want to trust the 47% of Americans who are parasites. The two men then had what some might call a subtle pissing contest, Mitch Daniels being all concerned about people getting help from the government in choosing a mortgage and Stephen with his desire to live next to a nuclear plant and not have all those burdensome regulations on it.

Mitch Daniels is concerned about the huge debt we have. Stephen does know his history and so schooled Mitch Daniels a bit. "We had a surplus when Bill Clinton left office, and you were George W. Bush's Director of Management and Budget. Who came in and chloroformed you and stole all the money?"

Thetwo then talked about books. Stephen told Mitch Daniels what his book reminded him of. Stephen's book, "America Again, Re-becoming the Greatness We Never Weren't." Both men agreed to endorse each others' book. I'm pleased to report that Stephen's book got the better endorsement.

If you think tonight was Shameless Plug Night, you are correct. Now, go read every post on my blog.