Very Very Big, Very Big

Let's get right to it. Donald Trump has been talking. His latest promotion is this: If President Barack Obama shows some assorted college and passport papers to Donald Trump, then Donald Trump promises he will give $5,000,000 to a charity of President Barack Obama's choice. There is a caveat. (Neat that he used that term considering who the guest was later in the show.) It must be by 5:00 p.m. (Neat again - another Latin term!) on October 31, 2012. If Obama does this, Trump will be totally satisfied.

Stephen has a generous and selfless counter-offer for Donald Trump with an offer of $1,000,000 from the Colbert Super PAC to any charity. All Trump has to do is basically just relax and stop talking for a little while. Let his cares melt away. Be one with the world. There is, however,  a similar caveat from Stephen. It also must happen by 5:00 p.m. on Halloween.

Is it possible to show a link between FOX, a bunch of questions, and a vigorous exercise routine? I think so and Stephen demonstrated how that could be done last night. He brought up the topic of Libya and then immediately showed many of the FOX newsypeople asking questions, such as, "Who?" "What"? "Why?" and "How?" (They forgot When and Where, but that was a few weeks ago in Libya.) Stephen asked a very important question. "If you put a statement in the form of a question, is that journalism?" We also got to see FOX Legal Analyst Peter Johnson, Jr. (or Richard Richard Richard as Stephen pointed out), admit, "I have no evidence of this."

But this whole question and question session was also a demonstration of what I assume is Stephen's exercise regimen that keeps his 6-pack firing on all six cylinders. He power-walked the studio. He danced down the steps. He climbed monkey bars. He tread on a treadmill. Even after this vigorous workout, he was still able to keep on with journalism by asking one last question. "But ultimately, the question is, how many questions do we have to ask before voters forget? President Obama killed Osama bin Laden."

Moving from journalism to politics, Stephen brought out his "Days Without a GOP Rape Mention" board. It had been at 13, but he had to erase that, write in a 0 (zero), sniff the marker before putting the cap back on it, and continue with his explanation. The latest GOP personality to blunder into the rape controversy is Richard Mourdock, Indiana candidate for U.S. Senate. He has said that even when a pregnancy results from rape, it is something that God intended to happen.

Stephen reminded us why he has to keep track on his "Days Without a GOP Rape Mention" board. There's Todd Akin with his "...the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down..." comment, Steve King who never heard of a girl getting pregnant from statutory rape, Tom Smith who equated rape with out of wedlock pregnancy, and Roger Rivard who offered advice that "... some girls, they rape so easy..."

"Well, some political careers they end so quickly," reported Stephen.  He calls them Team Rape. Stephen admits they probably don't appreciate that designation, but, "Come on, they're kinda asking for it."

Stephen felt the need to remind his fellow conservatives that in 1920, women won the right to vote. He then offered great advice to these fellow conservative men should they ever be in a conversation and feel the need to say something about rape. This was so important that he told them to go grab a pencil. He proceeded to give them wonderful advice, advice that should spare them the awkward positions they might get in by talking about rape or abortion.

Sadly this advice comes to late for Richard Mourdock. His campaign is in shambles, but Stephen realized this is just something God intended to happen.

Stephen's guest was not ancient, but he did talk about an ancient culture - the Romans. Anthony Everitt joined Stephen and he knows a whole lot about ancient Rome and has written many books. The most recent is "The Rise of Rome - the Making of the World's Greatest Empire." Although you might think someone who wrote about the ancient Romans would be all stuffy and boring, I actually think there was more humor and back and forth banter than with someone who is a movie star or comedian. Both men were obviously experts about Rome and Romans. Good times.

If It Ain't Broke

When something happens, people offer their take on it. It is the rare individual who can predict what will happen in the future and jump the gun on what everyone else will say when the event actually occurs. Richard Mourdock, GOP Republican Candidate in Indiana, is just such a psychic. Or so it seemed until you realize what the rest of the story was. He posted a YouTube video with his reaction to the Supreme Court's decision on Health Care. But to cover all bases, he posted four different reactions for four different scenarios.

Quick hint on how to be a psychic. "Pick a number between one and five."
"Okay, I pick the number four."
"Now look under the stapler."
"Wow! There's a note that says 'I knew you were going to pick four.' Amazing."

Here's how it works. In the top drawer was a note that said "I knew you were going to pick one." Behind the calendar was a note that said, "I knew you were going to pick two." Of course, this trick can only be used once with a each person. (I remember this trick from an episode of Columbo.) You can use this trick on those friends who don't watch old Columbo shows or read this blog. You will amaze them.

But back to the Republican psychic. Apparently all those YouTube videos were posted too soon - before the decision from the Supreme Court was handed down. The important thing about all of this is of course how Stephen reacts to it. He did his own set of reactions to Supreme Court decisions. That was actually very helpful because while I do pay attention to politics, no one can know everything and so it was great to hear what some recent decisions have been. Thanks for the information Stephen!

The Economy is Bad. That's bad, right? Or is that good? It's the old glass half full predicament. For Mitt Romney, it is wonderful. He can say it's all the fault of Barack Obama, so vote for me instead. On the other hand, people like Rick Scott in Florida say the Economy is good. And he says it's all because of him. This is simplifying things, sure, but it presents a problem for people like Rick Scott. He's a Republican so he should support Mitt Romney so that Romney can get elected. But Rick Scott also has to look out for himself and try to look good. Rick Scott says there's been a lot of job growth in Florida. That reminded me of a chart I saw about job growth. (I love charts and graphs.)

I digress. Stephen had some Rick Scott ads that he showed us and told us there was one problem with them. It seems that elderly Florida residents were confused and thought the Rick Scott ads were Barack Obama ads! (But they also think those Allstate ads are Obama ads, so not surprising. Apparently they are confusing Dennis Haysbert with Barack Obama.) Personally, I think Stephen is poking fun at Floridians and not giving them enough credit.

Last night's guest was Frank Deford, sportswriter. Most of the time I find that sportswriters are sports first and writers second. It seems to be the other way with him. He has a real passion for sports that goes beyond the simple win/lose of what I typically think of. His most recent in a long line of books is "Over Time: My Life as a Sportswriter." He and Stephen had a meaningful discussion on the two different meanings of Over Time. As it is spelled in the title, it would mean a long time span. But, being a sports enthusiast, it also brings to mind the extra time played after a game when the score is tied. So, nice play on words. The two of them briefly talked about anatomy and politics. Frank Deford brought the two of them together nicely by praising our opposable thumbs, saying how strange then not use them in sports (soccer) and (jokingly?) saying that's why America is such a super power. Well, I guess you had to be there to appreciate the humor of it all. Trivia about Deford. He played basketball for the Washington Generals, and thus played against the Harlem Globetrotters. He also is a big fan of Title IX.