Results are in. I conducted a very scientific poll and I can think of no reason why it does not reflect the will of the people in this matter. People voted for New Colbertland in record numbers. A whopping 50% voted for New Colbertland. That is more than three times as many as voted for the next most popular name. (Some names got absolutely no votes!!!)
Here are the results:
50% for New Colbertland.
15% for Santorumfornia.
10% for Lunarchusetts.
10% for Hermantown.
10% for West Paulina.
5% for Newtizona.
And for the names that got absolutely no votes:
0% for Bachmannouri.
0% for Huntsmanville.
0% for Mittigan.
0% for Perryland.
0% for South Buddyton.
0% for Thaddeusota.
0% for Tpawbama.
Therefore, New Colbertland it is. Next is to build a base on the moon. Then establish cities and name them. We'll need a state flag so artists and historians should start working on ideas for that. We will need a state bird and I think the Loon would be an excellent choice. It could be called the Moon Loon. Cheese would be a great idea for the State food. More will be needed but at least with a name for the 51st state, we have made a good start. Thank you to all the people who voted in the Poll. You have made a difference.
Showing posts with label Moon. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Moon. Show all posts
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Monday, February 13, 2012
Get the Dough Out
I have it on good authority that Ben and Jerry will be on The Colbert Report tonight. (Well, I saw Ben and Jerry on The Dylan Ratigan Show today and Dylan Ratigan said they will be on The Colbert Report tonight, so I assume it will happen.) Ben is a human being. Jerry is a human being. But Ben and Jerry's is not a human being. That is probably what Ben and Jerry will be talking about with Stephen. And also, get the DOUGH out.org will most likely be mentioned. And ice cream. They'll hopefully talk about ice cream, too.
Everybody is glad that Stephen is back from vacation. Jon Stewart will be back on his show, The Daily Show, which is the warm-up act for The Colbert Report. We can all now breathe a sigh of relief and enjoy the night again. I know it has been stressful for people when they can't watch Colbert and Stewart.
*** Just a few days left to vote in the very important "Name the New State on the Moon" poll. Even if you don't plan on living on the Moon, go ahead and cast your vote for your choice. You will have to write that state name of envelopes when you send birthday cards to your friends up there, so while you may not have a huge stake in what happens up there, it still is important what the name of the state will be. I'm sure that Stephen COLBERT would want you to vote. Stephen COLBERT would want you to look over the complete list and choose a name, whether it be the first name on the list, or something that reflects the fact that it will be the newest state, or whatever you as a viewer of The COLBERT Report think would be the best name.
Everybody is glad that Stephen is back from vacation. Jon Stewart will be back on his show, The Daily Show, which is the warm-up act for The Colbert Report. We can all now breathe a sigh of relief and enjoy the night again. I know it has been stressful for people when they can't watch Colbert and Stewart.
*** Just a few days left to vote in the very important "Name the New State on the Moon" poll. Even if you don't plan on living on the Moon, go ahead and cast your vote for your choice. You will have to write that state name of envelopes when you send birthday cards to your friends up there, so while you may not have a huge stake in what happens up there, it still is important what the name of the state will be. I'm sure that Stephen COLBERT would want you to vote. Stephen COLBERT would want you to look over the complete list and choose a name, whether it be the first name on the list, or something that reflects the fact that it will be the newest state, or whatever you as a viewer of The COLBERT Report think would be the best name.
Sunday, January 29, 2012
To the Moon Newt, To the Moon
As you may remember, Newt wants to go to the Moon. And he wants other people to live there. And then he wants the moon base to become a state.
This would be great. We can stop thinking about making Washington D.C. a state, or Puerto Rico, and let the Moon jump to the top of the list of places that want to be the 51st State in the United States.
Of course with 13,000 residents, there would need to be a lot of amenities and infrastructure to get people interested in living there. First of all, a Starbucks. That goes without saying. Probably a few bus stops since not everyone will have a car to get around. A large grocery store and maybe a small one with a good deli. Two elementary schools, one combined middle and high school and a small college, something such as Greendale Community College.
Additionally, there will need to be places to live. For single folks, some studio and 1 bedroom apartments. A variety of houses from one-bedroom up to four-bedroom houses. And then some really nice houses, the kind suitable for people like Stephen Colbert, maybe even some lakefront property. (Lakes to come later when we get enough water to the Moon.)
When these people are all settled up there on the Moon, they can start a government. I think they should have two political parties, the Moonbeams and the Sunbeams. They can choose a mayor for now. Then representatives for some kind of council, probably thirteen representatives, one for each 1,000 people.
First order of business: Naming the state. That may prove to be a difficult task, so I'm going to make it easier by offering the future residents some suggestions and even conducting a non-scientific poll to find which name seems to be most popular. Here's my list. If you think you would like to go live on the Moon by the year 2020, you can vote in the poll. Here's the choices in no particular order:
New Colbertland
Newtizona
Mittigan
Santorumfornia
West Paulina
Perryland
Bachmannouri
Hermantown
Huntsmanville
Tpawbama
South Buddyton
Thaddeusota
Lunarchusetts
Once a name is decided by the residents, then someone will have to decide other important matters. What will the ZIP code be? Will they get one Representative and two Senators for Congress? Will taxpayers pay for them to travel to and from Washington D.C.? Or will the elected representatives have to foot the bill for each trip. (That could be expensive.)
Will they have a high school football team? Will they play all their games away, you know, on Earth? Something that many people haven't thought of: What about TV, radio and Internet connections? For goodness sakes, how will the people in (new state name goes here) watch The Colbert Report? Has anyone thought of that? Has Newt Gingrich thought of that?
That could be the stumbling block that makes his whole "To the Moon" plan crumble. Who on Earth would willingly give up their daily fix of Stephen Colbert?
Not me, that's for sure.
This would be great. We can stop thinking about making Washington D.C. a state, or Puerto Rico, and let the Moon jump to the top of the list of places that want to be the 51st State in the United States.
Of course with 13,000 residents, there would need to be a lot of amenities and infrastructure to get people interested in living there. First of all, a Starbucks. That goes without saying. Probably a few bus stops since not everyone will have a car to get around. A large grocery store and maybe a small one with a good deli. Two elementary schools, one combined middle and high school and a small college, something such as Greendale Community College.
Additionally, there will need to be places to live. For single folks, some studio and 1 bedroom apartments. A variety of houses from one-bedroom up to four-bedroom houses. And then some really nice houses, the kind suitable for people like Stephen Colbert, maybe even some lakefront property. (Lakes to come later when we get enough water to the Moon.)
When these people are all settled up there on the Moon, they can start a government. I think they should have two political parties, the Moonbeams and the Sunbeams. They can choose a mayor for now. Then representatives for some kind of council, probably thirteen representatives, one for each 1,000 people.
First order of business: Naming the state. That may prove to be a difficult task, so I'm going to make it easier by offering the future residents some suggestions and even conducting a non-scientific poll to find which name seems to be most popular. Here's my list. If you think you would like to go live on the Moon by the year 2020, you can vote in the poll. Here's the choices in no particular order:
New Colbertland
Newtizona
Mittigan
Santorumfornia
West Paulina
Perryland
Bachmannouri
Hermantown
Huntsmanville
Tpawbama
South Buddyton
Thaddeusota
Lunarchusetts
Once a name is decided by the residents, then someone will have to decide other important matters. What will the ZIP code be? Will they get one Representative and two Senators for Congress? Will taxpayers pay for them to travel to and from Washington D.C.? Or will the elected representatives have to foot the bill for each trip. (That could be expensive.)
Will they have a high school football team? Will they play all their games away, you know, on Earth? Something that many people haven't thought of: What about TV, radio and Internet connections? For goodness sakes, how will the people in (new state name goes here) watch The Colbert Report? Has anyone thought of that? Has Newt Gingrich thought of that?
That could be the stumbling block that makes his whole "To the Moon" plan crumble. Who on Earth would willingly give up their daily fix of Stephen Colbert?
Not me, that's for sure.
Thursday, January 26, 2012
To Boldly Go
Today is Day 4 of the Colbert Super PAC crisis. It is taking a toll on Stephen, but he tries very hard to put on a good face. Meanwhile, continue to send in generous donations to the Colbert Super PAC.
The GOP debates are going quite well. As soon as they get up to 20 debates, they will get a free debate. When you have this many debates, there is a natural tendency for them to start getting boring. Luckily, the candidates are doing their utmost to keep them exciting. For example, Newt Gingrich promised to go back to the Moon.
"By the end of my second term we will have the first permanent base on the moon and it will be American. We will have commercial near Earth activities that include science, tourism, and manufacturing. When we have 13,000 Americans living on the moon, they can petition to become a state."
(That is quite an undertaking. I know for certain, in my heart of hearts, that Congress will be all thumbs up for this plan and will quickly pass whatever legislation is necessary to accomplish this lofty goal. Because after all, Congress is known for getting things done.)
Even as the debates keep getting better and better, we keep hearing that the GOP is scared to death of Newt becoming The Nominee. The thinking is that it would mean other Republicans would not be able to keep their seats in the House or Senate if Newt is the Republican candidate for President. How can they know that? Can they see into the future? Do they know something we don't know? Have they asked everyone how they will vote? Until all those questions are answered, it really is still up in the air. Way up in the air. In fact, you could even say it is up in the air all the way to the Moon.
Stephen had The Great Available Panel on the show tonight as well as some small footballs. This is the first time he has had a panel like this on. Joining him were John Harwood, Chief Washington Correspondent for CNBC, Katrina vanden Heuvel, editor of The Nation, and David Cassidy, aka Keith Partridge. They discussed the upcoming Florida Primary and who they thought would win it. (The four remaining candidates exchanged thoughts about each other at a recent debate. Read more about that here.) John Harwood predicted Mitt Romney would take Florida and win the nomination. Next question that Stephen asked was which is the best pie. All three got that one wrong. The answer is blueberry.
After so much intellectual, political, and culinary discussion, there was a complete change in direction with guest Drew Barrymore. You may remember here as Gertie in the movie E.T. about an alien coming to Earth. Stephen most certainly remembers her. I got the feeling that she was a fan of Stephen Colbert and he was a fan of Drew Barrymore.
You may have seen previews on TV lately for the movie that stars Drew Barrymore and John Krasinski - Big Miracle. If not, Stephen had a clip on The Colbert Report. This was quite rare. As a matter of fact, Drew commented that it was rare and she was honored. Anyway, the story is about three trapped whales that went from being a local news story to an international phenomenon. This is the perfect movie to watch this winter. It will warm your heart.
The GOP debates are going quite well. As soon as they get up to 20 debates, they will get a free debate. When you have this many debates, there is a natural tendency for them to start getting boring. Luckily, the candidates are doing their utmost to keep them exciting. For example, Newt Gingrich promised to go back to the Moon.
"By the end of my second term we will have the first permanent base on the moon and it will be American. We will have commercial near Earth activities that include science, tourism, and manufacturing. When we have 13,000 Americans living on the moon, they can petition to become a state."
(That is quite an undertaking. I know for certain, in my heart of hearts, that Congress will be all thumbs up for this plan and will quickly pass whatever legislation is necessary to accomplish this lofty goal. Because after all, Congress is known for getting things done.)
Even as the debates keep getting better and better, we keep hearing that the GOP is scared to death of Newt becoming The Nominee. The thinking is that it would mean other Republicans would not be able to keep their seats in the House or Senate if Newt is the Republican candidate for President. How can they know that? Can they see into the future? Do they know something we don't know? Have they asked everyone how they will vote? Until all those questions are answered, it really is still up in the air. Way up in the air. In fact, you could even say it is up in the air all the way to the Moon.
Stephen had The Great Available Panel on the show tonight as well as some small footballs. This is the first time he has had a panel like this on. Joining him were John Harwood, Chief Washington Correspondent for CNBC, Katrina vanden Heuvel, editor of The Nation, and David Cassidy, aka Keith Partridge. They discussed the upcoming Florida Primary and who they thought would win it. (The four remaining candidates exchanged thoughts about each other at a recent debate. Read more about that here.) John Harwood predicted Mitt Romney would take Florida and win the nomination. Next question that Stephen asked was which is the best pie. All three got that one wrong. The answer is blueberry.
After so much intellectual, political, and culinary discussion, there was a complete change in direction with guest Drew Barrymore. You may remember here as Gertie in the movie E.T. about an alien coming to Earth. Stephen most certainly remembers her. I got the feeling that she was a fan of Stephen Colbert and he was a fan of Drew Barrymore.
You may have seen previews on TV lately for the movie that stars Drew Barrymore and John Krasinski - Big Miracle. If not, Stephen had a clip on The Colbert Report. This was quite rare. As a matter of fact, Drew commented that it was rare and she was honored. Anyway, the story is about three trapped whales that went from being a local news story to an international phenomenon. This is the perfect movie to watch this winter. It will warm your heart.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Bleep Blorp
Neil deGrasse Tyson was on The Colbert Report again. He's up to seven times and after the eighth time he gets, what was it, a free sandwich I think. Neil deGrasse Tyson is probably my favorite astronomer and judging by Stephen's questions and comments, he is most likely Stephen's favorite astronomer also.
Tonight they talked about our waning space program. So many kids are pulled into science because of their fascination with astronauts. The current trend of using robots and unmanned vehicles just won't cut the mustard. Hopefully we can get back on track and get out there in space. If we don't do that, there will be no job for James T. Kirk in the future.
Who knew? Well actually lots of astronomers knew, but according to Neil deGrasse Tyson, an asteroid buzzed by Earth tonight (!) between the orbits of Earth and the Moon. Oh NO! Luckily, it did not hit us here on Earth.
When Neil deGrasse Tyson complained that Stephen Colbert's Earth photo was upside down, Stephen corrected him and told him "There's no up in space. Check and mate. I accept your apology."
Tonight they talked about our waning space program. So many kids are pulled into science because of their fascination with astronauts. The current trend of using robots and unmanned vehicles just won't cut the mustard. Hopefully we can get back on track and get out there in space. If we don't do that, there will be no job for James T. Kirk in the future.
Who knew? Well actually lots of astronomers knew, but according to Neil deGrasse Tyson, an asteroid buzzed by Earth tonight (!) between the orbits of Earth and the Moon. Oh NO! Luckily, it did not hit us here on Earth.
When Neil deGrasse Tyson complained that Stephen Colbert's Earth photo was upside down, Stephen corrected him and told him "There's no up in space. Check and mate. I accept your apology."
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