Down the Rabbit Hole

Politics was on the menu tonight on The Report. First of all Stephen talked about Mitt Romney who likes to fire people. And then Stephen continued with politics in Tip of The Hat, Wag of The Finger. He either tipped or wagged at Rick Santorum about Health Insurance.

When asked about the 50 thousand uninsured Americans dying due to a lack of health care every year, Santorum said this:

"I reject that number completely, that people die in America because of lack of health insurance. People die in America because people die in America." He continued, " ... people make poor decisions with respect to their health and their health care. And they don't go to the emergency room or they don't go to the doctor when they need to."

(Okay, I think Santorum is missing the whole connection between health insurance and the paying for the medical care. But I digress.)

Stephen apparently agreed with Santorum because he explained it in simple terms that anyone can understand.

"If you're dying of cancer, it's your own fault for not going to the doctor and if you can't go to the doctor because you don't have insurance, then it's your own fault for not having a job, and if you don't have a job because you're dying of cancer, get yourself to a doctor. What is wrong with you? Other than the cancer, obviously."

Stephen can talk circles around anyone!

Some folks have been complaining about a Halloween Party at the White House in 2009. And while it would have been easy for Stephen to cover up these complaints, he didn't. He had video of Sean Hannity saying, "The White House had an Alice In Wonderland party when the unemployment rate is at 9.9% in the country." And he showed Rush Limbaugh outraged and telling his fans, "The White House went Out --- Of --- The --- Way--- to cover this up." Thankfully Stephen never hesitates to tell it like it is. Of course, that's not the way it was.

You know, I'm thinking that maybe I remember Jon Stewart of Daily Show fame talking about that very same Halloween Party on his show way back then because he was making fun of Robert Gibbs in a Darth Vader costume. Seeing Robert Gibbs in a Darth Vader costume is memorable.

Anyway, Eric Schultz said this on January 8 of this year (2012):

If we wanted this event to be a secret, we probably wouldn't have invited the press corps to cover it, release photos of it to Flickr, or post a video from it on the White House website."

Go read more about it, and see a photo of the Obamas at the party here at the White House blog.

Next up was tonight's guest, Bill Moyers of Moyers fame. He actually served as White House Press Secretary some years back. When Stephen asked if he had ever withheld information from the Press Corp, Moyers (jokingly) admitted that he withheld information from President Johnson which was much more dangerous. They both had a good laugh about that.

Bill Moyers has a new show, Moyers & Company which naturally brought the conversation to the subject of people and corporations. Moyers had two things to say about this subject. First, "You can not have a people's democracy as long as corporations are considered people." Secondly, one of Moyers friends in Texas "will believe corporations are people when Texas executes one."

Jason Chaffetz and His Zen SleepOver

Sometimes when I tune it to watch The Colbert Report, I turn the Television Box on a little bit early. Last night I saw the tail end of Jon Stewart and his Daily Show. Sometimes Stewart has a segment called Moment of Zen. Jason Chaffetz, Republican Representative from Utah, was featured as he spoke to Fox. I think Jason Chaffetz must have had a "SleepOver" or something like that recently because he was quoted as saying that he was so scared to death that he would have to sit next to Representative Weiner.

That would be Anthony Weiner, Congressman for New York's 9th District - the Fighting Ninth. (Note to self: find out who Anthony Weiner's roommate was in Soho.)

Then Jason Chaffetz said something about morning and people eating oatmeal and people hurling. Well, that's just typical Chatty Catty talk that goes on at Sleepovers, not always very polite and usually shows that the speaker is a sore loser. But anyway, if he is scared to death, he should contact Stephen Colbert. Prescott Pharmaceuticals surely would have something to help Jason Chaffetz with his fear phobia, which I'm assuming would be SleepOverPhobia.

Moving on.

Stephen had a blurb for the book, "O - A Presidential Novel" by the author....hmmm.... No author. Apparently it is written by an anonymous person. Speculation is that it could be Joe Klein, Robert Gibbs, or Rahm Emanuel. (Joe Klein wrote "Primary Colors", Robert Gibbs is White House Press Secretary, and Rahm Emanuel is the future mayor of Chicago.)

On the Today Show, publisher Jonathan Karp speculated that it could be (drum roll) Stephen Colbert. (If you go to the Today Show link, ignore the parts about Mark Salter.) Obviously Colbert is a talented _______ (fill in the blank), and could easily have written yet another book. But I don't think so. Here's why. When talking about Stephen Colbert, Jonathan Karp pronounced his name "call bear" rather than "coal bear". I don't think the publisher would have gotten that wrong if he actually knew the real Stephen Colbert.

Stephen doesn't remember writing it.

(OMG. That book just got The Colbert Bump! Wow, I didn't see that coming.)

The beauty of an anonymous author is that everyone can then claim credit. So, if none of you are going to claim to be the author, then I will. I wrote the book!

Stephen debuted three inventions last night. The Toaster with Wheels, the Manhandler (a single bladed razor with 5 handles) and the Fork Phone (Phork Phone? Fork Fone?). That did not go well for him, but he is recovering.