Can I Come Back and Watch?

Have you ever wondered why the First Amendment is first? Me neither, but Stephen explained why it is the way it is. Mainly so that he can discuss the Second Amendment on his show. Well, that makes perfect sense. He went on to talk about other free speech issues, but I'm not at liberty to talk about them.

It's been a while since we last saw Sports Report so it was nice to see it last night.I'm glad that I don't have to analyze all the various sports on TV and luckily Stephen doesn't have to either for his Sports Report. He can just go to Fox and see what they have to say. And they had to say that football is suffering. That's because football is trying to cut back on that whole targeting other people's heads. Stephen pointed out that we are all born with bone helmets around our think meat, so what's the problem? The problem is the Wussification of America, that's what, according to the tackling dummy. America is getting wussified. This war on football shouldn't be happening. Stephen pointed out that it is possible to come back from an injury similar to what you might get in football and still have a great career. "Just look at The Five." Right you are Stephen.

Canadian-born Dr. Seuss fan, Ted Cruz, did what can only be described as a gab fest, or an all-nighter, or a quasi-filibuster, well, I guess it can be described a lot of ways, but the point is, he spent more than 21 hours on the Senate floor reading what I assume is the novel he finally finished, "Green Eggs and Ham," by Dr. Seuss. Perhaps it is a subtle way for him to show his support of alternative foods for hungry people. Hard to know. Anyway, Stephen listened to everything Canadian-born Ted Cruz said and came up with a fictional yard sign. It's fictional because it probably doesn't exist. I also don't think a Canadian can be president, but I'm no expert. Anyway, the sign says, "Cruz for President - If You're Not Paying Attention." Has a nice ring to it.

Stephen's guest was Joseph Gordon-Levitt, although I may have spelled Jordan's name wrong. Jordan is what you might call a very successful guy. His current movie is "Don Jon." I haven't seen it, but I think it's one of those boy meets girl type of movies. Stephen and Jordan traded lots of witty insights into the meaning of life, such as, okay, I'm not really going to put those witty comments here. You have to watch it in reruns or on Colbert Nation or on your own TV if you have TiVo or something like that. But they are witty. They also discussed the craft of being an actor. Stephen asked Jordan if it was hard to get into character for the movie. Also, "Are you in character now?"

I enjoy  Joseph Gordon-Levitt as a person and a singer and a actor and a producer, but what I really hope you noticed tonight was his socks. I've got to think Stephen liked them too.They are true American socks.